Archive | Pedro Report RSS feed for this section

Waxing and Whining

3. August 2007

4 Comments

Dig this: It’s a balmy summer’s day, in a very picturesque house by the beach, on a outdoor patio with a thatched roof, with flowing cotton curtains, a tall Brazilian model with extra long legs, a hulk of a guy with an oiled up body, a bubbling Jacuzzi foaming up steam, a [...]

Continue reading...

Pedro Report: Fib..Fabrication..Fantasy

27. July 2007

2 Comments

Premise: The Résumé of an IT professional is the most concocted document in this Solar System. The English language has a variety of words to differentiate a fib from fantasy.  Here are some words to describe the inexactitude in such IT resumes and a sample [...]

Continue reading...

Les Vulnerables

23. June 2007

4 Comments

Last weekend, few of us friends were planning to meet at a restaurant in Detroit some 100 miles away from our home town Lansing. On our way, we stopped at a friend’s place to say “hello”.
We always communicated well with each other. In fact our communication was so good, that Nortel [...]

Continue reading...

Analyticus 2K7

16. June 2007

2 Comments

OCD Corporation came out with their new line of computers called Analyticus 2K7 and it seems to be the most wanted tech toy in the market.
Our friend Paul, got one for his birthday from his pretty wife Marsha.
Analyticus 2K7 processes most requests that includes home budget calculation, Reminder System, Lawn watering, Kids’ routines, Pet care, Maintenance and [...]

Continue reading...

Dotcom Names

4. June 2007

0 Comments

Intelligent Software Engineer: Oxymoron.com
Perfect Software Engineer: Illusion.com
Perfect Project Manager: Miracle.com
Perfect Software User: Mutation.com
Software Tester: Testing123.com
Car Mechanic: Underthehood.com
Proctologist: DifferentPerspective.com
Cosmetic Surgeon: Bouncewitheveryounce.com
Funeral Home: Welldone.com
Dentist: TeethTotaller.com
Chinese Culinary Teacher: ChowHow.com
Women’s Table Tennis player: TTBird.com
Korean Piano tuner: TingTing.com
Priest: Wastedbullets.com
Asian Indian Recipes: Toiletpaperwillcatchfire.com
Thai Ice Hockey Team: GangPuck.com
Nike brand Sushi: Swooshie.com
Jesuit sponsored by Reebok: VectorRector.com
Massage Parlor: MuscleTussle.com
Gymnastic Home Helper: RubberMaid.com
Asian Buffet House: [...]

Continue reading...

Productivity of a Software Engineer

25. May 2007

3 Comments

This is an aggregation of inputs from a few software engineers.
On an average, a software engineer runs late everyday. The idea in their little heads is that, he or she left work late the previous day (That was actually a half-hearted compensation for the extra long lunch, the day before).
The moment he arrives, you can hear a [...]

Continue reading...

Project Status Meeting: Status quo

18. May 2007

1 Comment

The scenario: Weekly status meeting for a software project contracted to a software development company. Scheduled duration is 2 hours. All stakeholders present.
The story: Wilma, the secretary sends out an appointment to all the stakeholders and books a conference room. She forgets to send the agenda but never fails to order coffee and bagels. People [...]

Continue reading...